Putting FAMILY first



Kathryn Hays and Don Hastings as
Kim and Bob Hughes
April 2010 - 25th Anniversary



Last night, I was watching the 25th anniversary of  Bob and Kim's marraige? when I had some thoughts about family and relationships. It has led me to comments and reflections on 'putting family first' and how it relates to As the World Turns.

Everyone always talks about how scripted drama is becoming superfluous and boring in today's society, especially for the younger generation. I disagree; and I am reminded again and again of the disservice that the changes in focus away from story-telling in television, is forcing an unwelcome 'selfishness' on our culture. Where are the family values, the interaction with grandparents and having honest conversations with parents and siblings at the evening dinner table ? I may be old-fashioned, but I miss sitting on the front porch or doorstep, watching children ride their bikes down the street, and talking to the neighbors, while supervising your 16 year old son mowing the lawn. And, I blame technology for this. I long for respect, empathy and truth instead of ipads, DS and 'me, me, me'  of reality TV.

Will Estes, Len Cariou, Tom Selleck, Bridget Moynahan,
Donnie Wahlberg in Blue Bloods

I was bitterly disappointed with the remake of the classic drama, Hawaii 5-O because I saw only shoot-outs and chase scenes. The main characters seem much younger and there is not the real character and relationship development that existed between Jack Lord and James McArthur. In my opinion, there is one prime-time scripted drama now, that does show exactly what I want to see. Blue Bloods with Tom Selleck and Donny Wahlberg shows FAMILY and does it very well. We are introduced to an Irish-Catholic family in New York City, where the grandfather is a retired police officer (Len Cariou) and the widowed son (Tom Selleck) is the poilce Commissioner. His children include an older son as the 'not-by-the-book detective, the younger son as the rookie cop and the divorced daughter as the assistant DA. Yes, it could be considered rather cliche, but in this case, it works well. The best part is always the insistence of Sunday dinner, around a huge harvest table in the dining room, with spouses and children joining in the banter sometimes about police cases and sometimes about school, boyfriends and even sibling rivalry. No matter what the situation or drama, the relationships show support, compassion, love and personal conflict intermingled with the cases and crimes they are dealing with. It 'rings' honest and true. I recently 'gave up ' on Grey's Anatomy when it became contrived and just silly. I also don't like how the networks think that viewers only want the sensational and the ugly. I would much rather see an honest conversation between father and daughter about feelings they experienced when the mother passed away (Blue Bloods), than see a deranged killer go on a shooting spree in a hospital. Sorry, that's just my opinion.

Santos Ortega nad Helen Wagner
as Grandpa Hughes and Nancy

'Putting family first' has somehow lost it's appeal in today's society. I don't think the writers of ATWT ever lost that strong committment and endearing quality. It was made evident in the early portrayal of Irna Philllips characters with the Hughes and Lowell families. It was then further expanded to include the Stewarts, Montgomery's, Snyders and even Walshes. There was a sense of community, common interest and insight into middle American life. We always knew that Grandpa Hughes would be upset with Lisa because he felt that she had abandoned her little boy, Tom. We also knew that Ellen would do anything to find the son she had given up for adoption. Most of the discussions were simple, honest common sense advice. It was always warm, welcoming and true to real life.

When the focus was taken away from 'family'; and life became 'fast-paced', with an emphasis on upwardly mobile young career-minded adults who had little use for the 'older and wiser' members of their extended families, most serial dramas shifted and lost much sincerity and 'realness'. Although the writers of ATWT, also seemed to lose the 'sense of family', they were wise enough to get it back, especially in the last few months before the end. I am especially reminded of the relationship that Nancy Hughes had with Katie Peretti. For me, Helen Wagner's last on-screen appearance will forever remain in my heart as somewhat ethereal and prophetic. Through 54 years of 'putting family first' on ATWT, I would like to show through three examples of how the writers and actors were able to achieve authenticity and a sense of belonging in respect and honour. Although I could have given countless examples of how this was achieved through great storytelling and the development of relationships on ATWT, I will limit myself here to show how Barbara and Kim were able to make the connection between reality and scripted drama, as they put family first.  

Kathryn Hays and Colleen Zenk

Kim Reynolds and her sister Jennifer were close but, as in most families, they both vied for attention from the handsome doctor, Bob Hughes. Barbara was married to James Stenbeck and often asked her aunt Kim for advice after her mother, Jennifer died. Having been married to John Dixon, Kim was quite adept in dealing with a man who was so self-absorbed and selfish that he destroyed the one good relationship he could have had with his wife and son, Andy. Often the advice that Kim would bestow on her somewhat naive niece, would be how to cope with James and all his indiscretions. As husbands changed for both women, the love and respect they had for each other never changed. When Barbara became hard and cruel, Kim was often harsh, but never judgemental to the point where she gave up on her niece.  Kim would get very angry with Barbara when she felt that her niece had gone astray and made some disastrous and dangerous decisions as a controlling and conniving mother. Kim was never one to mince words with Barbara, and I think that Barbara respected and loved her aunt because of Kim's honesty.

At Fashions with Barbara, Kim and Lisa

The first example goes back a few years to when Barbara lost Johnny. Barbara was married to John and seemed to really have put her life back together when she lost her baby. Andy talks to Barbara about her loss and then Hal (Barbara's ex-husband) brings Jennifer and Will to see their mother.  After they leave, Barbara is inconsolable. Kim comes in and is able to put life and family into perspective for Barbara.

No one will ever be able to convince me that these scenes are not heartfelt and true in every sense of the word. It shows clearly just how family comes first - always.

Ode to this Day

for yesterday is but a dream and tomorrow will be a vision

but today will live tomorrow

 and makes every yesterday dream of happiness

and every tomorrow a vision of hope

look well therefore to this day

Another very poignant scene in 2008, and one that really hits 'home' is shown when Barbara confesses to Kim that she has oral cancer. Kim makes Barbara see that although, yes, she should be concerned for her family, she must also take the time to look after herself in order to heal. 

 Kim to Barbara, "It matters to me, kiddo. I am your family. I need to know about this. Mama is here".

When Bob was focused on hospital business and didn't respond to Kim's subtle yet emotional pleas for attention, I was heartbroken for her. It wasn't because she was saying anything new, provocative or even prophetic. It was simple, heartfelt and true. Family should come first. All Kim wanted was for Bob to take some time to be with her. It was their 25th wedding anniversary; and yet Bob treated the occasion nonchalantly. She even made the point that what she admired so much about her father-in-law, Chris Hughes, was that he had always taken the time to spend with his family. Kim saw that quality in Bob, as well. Yet, over the years, Bob had let work and 'life' consume his time.

Kim to Bob, "He always put his family first. That's what I am doing. That's what I am asking you to do."

And there is the point of my blog, today.

As My World Turns - Why I care?

I have been a devoted fan of As The World Turns for 50 years. When it was cancelled, I lost interest in the genre because I honestly felt that a serial drama's worth and importance was based on it's history. I grew up with the Hughes and Lowell families; and listened to my mother's daily recountings of Lisa's antics and the drama with Penny, Jeff, Ellen and the Stewarts. I watched through the '60's, '70's, '80's, '90's and to the finale in 2010.

I have run a home-based business for the past 25 years. Watching ATWT every afternoon for my lunch break became my daily 'pleasure'. I was never obsessed, wrote a fan letter, joined a fan club or even tried to talk to my neighbors and family about the show. It was MY private time - my one hour of fantasy. My husband is not a fan of soaps or even fiction (other than Steinbeck and the classics) , but he never once said anything negative about my interests.

Don McLaughlin and Helen Wagner
as Chris and Nancy Hughes

When ATWT went off the air, I was somewhat lost. My 'reel' family was gone. Not just one character, all the characters. It doesnt matter to me that the executives have said that it was their time to 'go'. Marie Masters said in an interview, "Dont be sad that we are gone, be happy that we were here at all". Yes, I have 50 years of memories to fall back on through my albums and reflections with my fb friends. But, I am here because  I want more. I am not happy that ATWT is gone from my life. And, I intend to do something about it. I am not here to win a popularity contest and make the best fan page or even have the most fb friends. I am only here for three reasons.

First, to HONOUR my 'story', As The World Turns. I want to give back to the actors and writers that gave me pleasure for half a century.

Cast photo 2006

Second, to HELP save the entire SOAP OPERA storytelling history that IS the DAYTIME SERIAL DRAMA. I am not interested in which network and which executive is negatively responsible for dishonouring the genre. They all are. I know that, and you know that. Whining about it and having power struggles on the internet doesnt serve any purpose, whatsoever. That's why social media is important. It is where we can all meet and prove that fans can actually interact and unite for a common purpose.

 

Don Hastings and Kathryn Hays
on the last day on set

My third reason for being here is directly related to the people I have met on this social nework. I arrived here by accident last July when I was making a digital scrapbook as a tribute to ATWT before it went off the air. I stayed and I fell in love with facebook friends who shared a common interest. I have had a few difficulties along the way, but I am here for the love of my 'story'. I know most of you are here for exactly the same reason (whether your soap was GL, AMC, OLTL or ATWT). I will make a difference because I want to, not because I need to. And no one can take that away from me. I am here for the fans, ATWT and myself. And so are you.

Here is the interview with Don Hastings and Kathryn Hays, shortly before the end of ATWT. It is so heartfelt, honest and revealing.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9ez4GvopGg

  
    

Helen Wagner and Eileen Fulton

I first started watching As The World Turns in 1960, just as Lisa Miller came to Oakdale. My mother watched Search for Tomorrow, the Edge of Night and As The World Turns. She would talk to me about what was happening in each of these serials. As a child, I became interested in Ellen Lowell's search for the son she had given up for adoption. I watched on sick days, holidays, summer vacations and loved the Christmas shows. I watched through High School, University and into adulthood. My best conversations with my mother always were when she would tell me what happened on ATWT. In the '90's (when the veteran actors were summarily dismissed in favour of young storylines that were not related to the core families), my mother lost interest in ATWT and started watching 'Coronation Street' and the Australian soap, 'Neighbors'.

The only time I would ever consider myself to be an 'obsessed' fan, was during the Douglas Marland years. In 1982, when Tom and Margo (Justin Deas and Margaret Colin) were running from Mr. Big in the jungle, I refused to go to the hospital, while I was in labour with my son. I watched the day's episode on a tiny 12 inch black and white screen (before I had a VCR). I was mezmerized by the love story, during contractions. My son was born a few hours later.  I often didn't care for the somewhat contrived storylines in the last years and the disrepect to the veteran actors, but I still watched; and never stopped. I couldn't. As The World Turns, the characters, the actors and even the writers gave me stories for half a century that I could relate to as some of the best memories of my life.

When news of the cancellation of ATWT came, I wasn't concerned because I heard that there was hope it would be picked up by someone else, including Lifetime. In June 2010, I obtained my first laptop and I joined facebook. I had already made several digital scrapbooks of vacations and my family, so I decided to make a scrapbook of ATWT. I had saved several photos from the 50th anniversary on the hard drive of my main computer; and I was quite dismayed when I found out that CBS had removed them. So, I needed to keep the memories of ATWT alive for myself. And, I had to do it in a hurry. I had no intention of sharing my scrapbook album. While I was scouring the internet for any pictures of ATWT, I discovered the facebook fan pages.I copied some pictures, made my tribute album and started to look at some of the comments on the fan pages.



Eileen Fulton and Michael Swan

One day, Michael Swan made a comment on the ATWT page.
I was completely awestruck. That was one year ago. I made my first comment (something like a true fan > "Hello Mr. Swan. I loved your portrayal as Duncan on ATWT"). I was 'hooked'. I sent my first friend requests to Micahel Swan, himself. I was like a 'kid in a candy store', when Michael Swan became my first celebrity facebook friend. I read on his wall that a lady by the name of Martha ...... wrote something to him. I immediately recognized the name as that of Martha Byrne (my wonderful Lily/Rose). I had finished my scrapbook tribute, so I sent it to her. I was absolutely thrilled when Martha ......... messaged back that she loved the album and really appreciated my efforts. She suggested that I share it with all the fans and on her fan page. I also saw a comment by Anthony Herrera and he also accepted my friend request. I was in 'fan heaven'.

Martha Byrne at the 2011 Daytime Emmys

I decided to post my scrapbook pages on the fan pages. I had joy in my heart that other people could see the memories, photos and tributes to MY favourite family generational daytime drama. That was the start of my heartfelt desire to not only save ATWT but the genre, itself. I joined the campaign to try to save ATWT, signed petitions, wrote letters and compiled testamonials for later use.

I was persuaded to make my own fan based fb page. So, in late October 2010, although, I was not proficient with my computer skills or facebook, I set up my fan facebook page. It was a true fan page with my tribute albums, photos, videos and I amassed many new fb friends that had a similar love of ATWT (even though it was now gone).

 In November, Colleen Zenk had expressed a desire to be on Dancing with the Stars. One of her close personal friends started a group page called Colleen Zenk Deserves to be on DWTS. Colleen opened up her personal page to accept friend requests form ALL her fans. We were ALL thrilled that we could give back to this fantastic woman, all that she had given her fans for 30 years. In a few short months, the group has 10,000 + fb members.

Colleen Zenk

I sent a personal message to Ms. Zenk  about how I felt about, not only her performance as Barbara Ryan on ATWT, but my admiration for her as an individual and as a two-time cancer survivor. Colleen Zenk sent back a most touching and heartfelt correspondences that I will always keep close to my heart.

In late February, I was directly involved with getting a facebook group started, with the express purpose of getting fan support to be in the position to ask Oprah Winfrey to consider adding As The World Turns and Guiding Light on her OWN network. We didn't care if she would consider new production, high quality reruns or even a soap talk show that would feature Martha Byrne. Oprah is the richest woman in the world. She showed an interest, her new channel was not doing well, and we had the idea. We worked the group with many fabulous posts, videos, and 'memories'. We wanted it to be a page that Oprah could go and see how much the fans cared about the losts shows.

After the ABC soaps were cancelled in April, the group changed it's focus away from Oprah and OWN and tried to support the campaign to save the entire genre. It is an uphill battle, especially since ATWT was part of the P&G legacy that has yet to be penetrated. If only we could get reruns on a dedicated cable soap channel or maybe even new production on the internet. And it would be a dream come true if DVDs of classic episodes could be made available.

Don Hastings and Kathryn Hays

Within the next five years, everything will be different. Technology is moving so fast, we will see what is in store for the serial drama. Storytelling will not die. From Aesop to Shakespeare to Dickens and Steinbeck to Dan Brown and then to radio serials, soaps on the 3 networks to the internet - society is ever-evolving. I hate reality television. I see absolutely no worth or merit. I call it 'fluff'. Who knows how we will be watching 10 years from now - cable/satellite, internet, tablets and iphones. Who knows if the television screens will even be around. I would hate to think that the scripted drama will not be around for my grand children to enjoy. Storyltelling will always be a way, not only into a fantasy world, but a way to deal with issues, societal mores and an insight into relationships . We all need a good 'story'.

Rosemary Prinz and Don Hastings as
Penny and Bob Hughes

I had always been reluctant to watch any other soap, because I didn't have any personal history; and I truly believe that, for me, that is the most important part of being a devoted fans love of a particular serial drama. I feel you must be able to relate to a character's personal history and develop a relationship with the families, town and life on the 'reel'. I can do that with ATWT. I always could.

Now, my 'story' is gone and I am left with memories, scrapbooks, a definite, small hope for the future and best of all, facebook friends that have shown me that a cliche can be true - 'even though a door closes, a window may open'.

That is why I have started writing this blog. That is why I made a facebook page dedicated to As The World Turns and it's cast and crew. That is why I became involved in groups and campaigns to save the genre. I do this for myself and for my 'friends' - you know who you are. Thank you.

Angie.